wow… I feel myself so profound to write this text,LOL. If you read it, don’t judge on grammar

A caged bird, it enjoys its life within the golden color cage. It does singing every morning. It sings about the things that he sees everyday. The room outside the cage, the book shelf stands next to it, the yard outside the window. He looks through the window from the second floor and sees a tree that is not even taller than the window. That’s how he thought about tree. He then likes jumping around that little standing bar and grap the bar tight with its feet. That is sort of exercising for itself. A caged bird never worried about his life. Someone open the cage and feed it. This is not its favorite meal but it has to eat, because it can only eat what people feed it. At the same time, the guy replaces a newspaper with the dirty one. It always enjoys his comfortable cage. Comfortable is not because the environment pretty or what. Comfortable is because it gets used to the environment. Comfortable is because it likes to stay with everything in his expectation. Comfortable is because it doesn’t have to face challenges or problem. Even though someone open the cage, it prefers to stay in the cage because it is afraid to take a long time to get used to the environment. It is afraid to face challenges. It is afraid to see things that out of his expectation. It likes to stay with the cage, but it forgets about how beautiful the outside world is before it lives in the cage, how big the world is compared to its cage. He fails to see the tree taller than the house that rooted next to it. It chooses to stay in the cage and look at the sky instead of getting rid of the cage and fly into the blue sky. It forgets about how does it feel to fly, how free it can feel in flying. It forgets what is freedom. It dones’t even have a chance to pick what it likes to eat. It just eats the assorted-flavored bird food. It forgets about how delicious a juicy apple can be. 

I hope this bird will break out form the cage. Flying in liberation. When it is flying in the blue big sky, it can see how beautiful the world under it, rather than a dirty newspaper. It can choose whenever that he wants to go. the challenge that it faces to won’t bring it down but just makes it even stronger. i hope it can see how small the cage is compared to the world under it as it looks back. I hope it can be free.

I had vision today that a butterfly is breaking out from chrysalis, I think everyone this year will have a unforgettable experience, God is going to transform us, He is going to do some crazy works on us, a lot of improvement will be done by the end of this year, like a butterfly grows from the worm, WE WILL NEVER BE THE SAME!!!!!! 

It is so ironic that we hate that we are so lazy about school work, and we feel bad when we get bad results. But once we get into the nerdy mode, there are tons of school works and pressure fall over you,and you want to do well on everything, I hate that kind of pressure, it takes over all my leisure time and just makes me to plan every minute dedicates to study. But then I feel bad if I didn’t study when I suppose to, cause I don’t want bad result. I start to realize how a sophomore lump starts, I do not want that, I guess I just have to plan and everything and follow the plan. I have been overwhelming a lot by those pressures, I even felt like it blocks my way to talk to God. I just pray for God that give me the power to get over school and also have time to bond with people.

I went to Soak two days ago, I could literally feel the group name, I felt like I literally soak in the presence of God, this is like a cliche, but his presence is SOOO thick…..  All my bad feelings and thoughts just go away, He cleaned my body and mind, I could feel it. God is so kind that no matter how many times you upset Him, he just forgives you every time and hold you tight with Him. 

I don’t think share gospel has to be something formal, like you walk on the street, set up a booth and ask about people, ‘have you heard about Jesus?’

I think tonight Holy Spirit just told me that I have to share His gospel, my faith in Him. I don’t wanna label people, but I just knew, actually I should know some of the edge people really have shaken faith in God, they are not sure if that is His love or by chance, or typical example that their faith were shaken because God doesn’t answer their prayer. Some of them may be afraid to give up their control and being control by Him, or simply they afraid if they will get return in believing God, that faith actually haha. Share gospel can be spontaneous, like tonight.

Thanks God for real, really really thanks God that He can give me a time to share gospel with my mum, my mum is the typical person that loss faith in God. It came from nowhere to talk about God, and she kept questioning about God and her stress from daily life and family. But I just realized that God has been used my body to say His word to her, make me think logically and speak out His word from my mind. I have a feeling that tonight, God’s word did change her, even though a little bit, also, I feel more comfortable to talk to my mum, in a more-friendly way, that’s what I keep praying for. Amen!!! I really felt there is a warm air blow to my heart when we keep saying positive word to each other, it is not an easy job for me and my mum said the words like this. Oh God, you just purely amazing.

Today my theory, you just have to see things differently, not think only, try to accept it, you really find things a lot, really, a lot easier

Dude, I am so lazy to type tumblr and have been overwhelm by summer intensive, literally ‘intensive’, it feels like going back to high school, when you go home, you either studying or eating, no break at all, which is sucks, I swear I will never ever take 4 classes in summer again. 

Actually, I have been burn out a little bit in this past few weeks, I don’t know why, I am not like ‘I am sick of worshipping or bible’, is like ‘I know You are already here, just bless me everything’, I guess I really overwhelm by schoolwork, and forgot to see how faithful and awesome He is. I don’t want like people fall down because of the Holy Spirit but still I am really hunger for His love just overflow from my body, to have that being filled with His presence. 

Just started last week, God has been doing good on me and keeping my fire burning in Him. My academic was really bad in the middle of summer, but then the test in last week was not excellent, but God just kept giving me signs of hope academically to encourage me keep studying and get over the summer sessions. Also, being soaked in His presence, I found myself has more control on my anger, I get less easier to get mad at people, like the house owner just annoyed me two days ago, it was so annoying that I think I will argue with her if I lived without Him. But in His presence, he was like telling me, ‘Anggie, admit your fault, and be patient to her annoying, because maybe she hasn’t seen her son for a long time and being stuck in a house and doing nothing, just being a listener for her to speak out the stress.’  Really, I was feeling good when she annoyed me, I don’t mean I like my mistakes. Remember last time she talked to me like that, I was pissed off, I was totally having ‘pissed off’ face to her, and feeling very angry about that.  And I think the things that house owner annoyed me about, is God’s will, He wants me to be a better person, not just being good spiritually, but also good in responsibility.

I found my iPod classic today at church, once again praise Him.

Recently I have been in a mindset that I am good at studying, seriously, cause the class I am taking now are the class I ‘ve taken before. So, I always get lazy that I don’t study more detail, I mean I think I know it and just skim through really quickly. Also, when it comes to exam, cause I’ve been practicing the same type of question before, I always miss out some part to answer or misunderstand what it is asking.  This is very frustrating to me, it happened to me last semester, I don’t want it happens again in summer. So… I think I just keep praying that my pride would go away and study well for school. I feel a bit better to type it out.  OK, get buff and get A in summer!!!!

Back to nor cal, praise Him again i can be here safely, here is a little thing from me, I think english worship is more powerful than Chinese, is kind of hard to explain, maybe I am too get used to english one, but the song in chinese is not, the lyrics is not contemporary enough for me to under the whole meaning of the song.

Okay, so then I had a drink with my friend today, he told me I should do a testimony in church, he sees me change when I come back here, I was really happy, happy for how God change me and people notice the God’s work, I suddenly felt so much joy from Him, is happy for God (actually a bit happy for myself, hehe), is like you happy for people happy for your change, is kind of hard to explain….. I just felt the Holy spirit came and made me happy. And back to church today, i felt like I have a mission to share more gospel to people, share the joy of His love, I really want to know them more even though I just knew them.  I just felt Him recently gave me a gift that I have no fear to talk, play and hangout with people that I knew or just knew, (maybe is after the fasting and banquet), I just wanna know them more, wanna investigate them more, I also found myself different when I back here, the thought to people is totally different, in a good way, I am amazed how God help me to clean up my thought to people.

Then now I want to love them!!!!!!!!  People, brace yourself for His love!!!!!

So, today i just drove to Nor Cal today, i didn’t really scared about that even though people keep telling me be careful, I didn’t notice until I ignite my car, I started to worried about what if my tires falt on the highway? What if something pokes my tires and goes flat? What if a pipe pop up and break my windows? (So many things left on my windows actually, is bird doo doo) I started to panic, and wonder should I really go up by myself, but praise God, He just took care everything today on the way back there. Seriously, I didn’t really feel tired at all, actually I did, but just the first hour, but I in the middle of driving, God kept encountering me for like 5 mins, I felt like I drink 1000 coffee and feel so refresh and just wanna drive all the way without stopping, I didn’t stop to take a rest actually except the pee times. I just kept playing music and the snack I prepared, doing silly things on the car and keeping myself awake. Actually i want to say about the spiritual attack, I just prayed for Him that protect me and drive there safe, for one seconds just want to feel His presence, then He came for 5 mins. What I am trying to say He knows us completely, even though you thought about Him for a second, He comes right away. I just wanna share this joy actually. Yay…. man, you just made me drove 7 hours with only 15 mins break. (actually three pee times). God just had so much blessings to me these days, Mmm…….

Oh…. thank God. Thank You so much for today. I really love to share my baking good with other people. I like to make it and see people enjoy it. So, I was kind of happy to walk around to give them food, I felt good.

Also thanks You for having such a great time to pray for those juniors. I don’t know sometimes if I am charged with holy spirit, I always get hyper after re:act, I found myself want to pray for so many seniors and I haven’t really pray for people before. Praise God that You did it again to me, you answer my prayer for me to pray for more people out loud. But thanks Rebecca today also, I almost fell into the mentality that I have to practice my prayer, to use fancy word, incredible prayer. She just reminds me that praying is just the organic you and God, just you and Him having conversation, so just speaks what you up to your mind.

Dude, even though I knew some of them gonna stay here after today, but still the feeling is so sad, T__T. 

I was listening Lady Gaga new album, I discover there are so many songs linked to Christianity: Judas, Black Jesus; Amen Fashion. Then I look on the website to see if she is a real Christian, and I discover that she believe in God and Jesus, but she accepts homosexuality. In other word, she has her own belief.  

While looking on it, I saw the advertisement near the website, “gaychristian101.com”, I was like “did I read it wrong?” I look on the website and it is the website for Gay Christian. I know we don’t discriminate gay people but I found the website ridiculous that on the column, they have “Find a Gay Church”. Also I look on the FAQ, they claimed that the ancient Greek doesn’t have the word “homosexuality”, and say so God accepts homo. actually. Aiya…….. how His word become so twisted, I am so mad about that!!!!!

I am shocked by how people can twist God into their personal belief, that’s like a person who doesn’t like butter because of afraid to gain weight, but eating a cookie. This is ridiculous, I don’t mean you should follow all the stuff on bible, but at least He wants us to share the REAL gospel. When a person is becoming famous, he has to think about his responsibility that his influence to the other, especially religion. A wrong gospel can runin a person’s life.

People want to believe in God but always tempt by their desires in the world. If you really need God’s help, you should take off every desire in the world and let Him decides which desire you truly want. I just pray for the people that have twisted belief can converted as soon as possible by God to touch them who they really believe in, and let God to take over and arrange their life.